Archive for the ‘philosophy’ Category

I am enraged. I am burning up inside. I am about to explode in a fiery feminist ball of fury!

Posted: January 10, 2018 in Activism, Feminism, Personal Essay, philosophy, think about it
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I haven’t posted in a while. 756 days to be exact (that’s a made up number). The reasoning? Feeling like the world is going to shit and there’s nothing I can do about it. Why have I decided to post today? Sex. Sexual misconduct. Sexual harassment. Sexual abuse. Sexual Violence. Rape. Molestation. CONSENT.

I started this blog eight years ago because I wanted to share my feelings, ideas, opinions and thoughts with the world. I had such strong feelings about my experiences and surroundings and was curious if anyone felt the same way. I never once used my blog as a teaching tool. I wasn’t writing to preach my opinions or convince others to see the world through my eyes. I often put disclaimers on my posts stating I don’t know anything about anything.

This is not that kind of blog post.

Today I not only have something to say, but I have something to teach. Today I AM going to try and convince you to see the world as I do. Today there will be no disclaimer.

There is much discussion about the increasing amount of sexual harassment* coming to light in every country, city, town, business, sport, school, house, room and bed on this planet. If you haven’t heard or still don’t realize, sexual harassment* happens everywhere, to every kind of person. If this is shocking to you than you are one of the privileged people who was born with a set of amour that gives you a mild form of protection against this abuse. However, even that amour cannot protect you 100%. How do I know this? Because I was born with a set of amour, white, middle class amour, and I was not fully protected by it.

There is much discussion about why sexual harassment* has become so rampant in global society. There is even more discussion about why sexual harassment* is STILL happening in the so called “developed world”. I know the answer. Sexual abuse* has been a part of human society since humans began recording their history and I would argue since long before that. In fact, it is still legal in many countries to sexually abuse* women, men and children as a form of punishment or retribution.

In countries where sexual harassment* is illegal there is a fear and stigma built up around it that makes it almost impossible for those experiencing it to defend, speak up, and demand justice for themselves. When those brave few are able to grab a hold of their voice they are then ripped apart by family, friends, coworkers, judges, police officers, and the media.

In short, sexual abuse* has always been here.

I’m not sad. I’m not depressed.  I’m not in despair. I am enraged. I am burning up inside. I am about to explode in a fiery feminist ball of fury!

There is no other option. THIS. MUST. END. The time was up long ago.

I have a suggestion. I have an answer. I do not have THE answer but an answer, because as with all social issues there is no one way to move forward. Instead we must create an endless river of consistent changes. However, no matter the issue (poverty, racism, sexism, violence) the river must always start with the youngest of people, with the intervention of early education. And not just standardized education. Sexual education. Compassionate education. Anthropological and sociological education.

There’s a reason we start school when we are young. It is how we as humans learn. We take our time to mature and develop. You don’t start primary/elementary school learning how to read Tolstoy or doing complex calculus or being expected to solve physic problems. Instead we start by learning the alphabet, and simple numbers. Then we move up to spelling small words, and adding tiny numbers etc. Our education is gradual. Sexual education should be no different. Sex ed should move from simple understandings about the body to more in depth discussions about things like intimacy, pleasure, contraception, and STI protection in high school and beyond.

Why isn’t current sexual education gradual? Or worse, why is sexual education non-existent for the majority of the world’s population?

When we grow up learning about sex it will no longer be a taboo or shameful topic to discuss. People should grow up understanding that sex is not be used as a form of power over someone else. Sex should not be used as a form of control. Sex should not damage your sole. Sex should not be used as a fear tactic. Sex should be about fun and pleasure, and if you want it to, sex can also be about reproduction. Sex should be built on the foundation of respect for each others bodies and for our own.

Some will argue that sex* is too complex for children to understand, but it’s not. When I speak about sexual education I really mean body education, autonomy education. Children should and must grow up with the understanding that their body is their own. WE OWN OUR BODIES. Therefore, we make the rules for our bodies. We decide what feels good, who can touch us, and when we want something to stop or keep going. We are the sole givers of consent and we reserve the right to revoke it at any time, in any space.

I own my body. I am an expert in my life experiences. I know that sexual education can and will drastically reduce sexual abuse, sexual harassment, sexual violence, rape, and molestation. Do you?

Note: I understand that cultural differences and understandings affect the ability of sexual education to be taught in school. However, cultural differences cannot and should not be blamed for sexual abuse, except in a global sense. I know that not a single person on this planet WANTS to be sexually abused/harassed/violated/raped/molested regardless of their race, culture, religion or creed. Therefore, these differences should not be a reason to give up the fight against sexual abuse/violence/harassment/rape/molestation.

I also understand that formal education is not offered to millions of people, however sexual education is something that does not need a classroom to be taught!

* This post is about all forms of sexual abuse, harassment, misconduct, rape, molestation, violence. So when I use one of these terms I am really mean all of these.

If you are experiencing sexual abuse tell someone you trust.

www.crcvc.ca/links/

Equality = Acceptance of Difference + Love x Compassion

Posted: March 26, 2013 in Equality, inspiration, Love, philosophy, think about it, Video
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I turned this post into a video blog, here’s the link http://telly.com/AHJBM3

I think I have an analogy for the world, a comparison, a similarity….Okay, I don’t really know what it is so I’m going to begin with a bit a backstory. A setting up of the punch line if you may.

As some of you may know I am a nanny for triplets, all girls. I’ve been taking daily care of them for fours years now. As many of you may not know, caring for triplets and or raising them is quite different from raising a singleton, twins, or several kids of different ages. It comes with many disadvantages but also its fair share of positives. I love my job and have gained so much life experience by being able to submerge myself into the family mould both by becoming family member but also an observer. Everyday get to see the challenges a family/marriage must face from a relatively non-bias point of view. Is it a beautiful thing to witness but also somewhat tragic. I see how much the outside world affects who you are as a person. When I started watching the girls were barley speaking, they had such a limited vocabulary because they had developed their own language to talk amongst themselves, they spoke triplet. This quickly changed as I talk A LOT and was spending upwards of 10hrs a day with them. They were quick to learn from me.

As they grew older and their vocabulary grew larger I tried to teach them as best I could to be understanding of others. I love to see them standing up to anyone who uses a colour as an adjective to describe as person.

“People are not colours.”  They say.

“What?” Confused bystander.

“They’re just people.” They smile and continue on.

This is not a dramatization this has happened many times, they are expremely vocal to and about their surroundings.

I’ve Mentioned before in a post but I think it’s important to repeat that we have also discussed things like same-sex relationships, adoption, poverty, charity, amputations, metal disabilities, crime, recycling, aliens, religion, racism, and hate among a plethora of other things. Now I want you to understand we don’t sit down and say, “Today we are going to talk about same sex relationships.”
No, they always initiate it by asking a question about something that is abnormal or different to them. I answer them in the way I would have wanted to be answered when I was a child. They responded greatly to this. Now that they have begun school some of this teaching has been damaged by opinions of their peers and their peers personal family ideal, however I do still see more empathy and compassion in their souls then most adults and I hope the world doesn’t keep breaking it down.

I seem to have gotten a little off track but as I said this is the back story to this epic analogy to describe equality and the lack their of it (if you haven’t guessed yet, the triplets are involved ;p )

About 20 min ago I was telling my best friend about my day with the girls and how I painted all three of their nails. I told her how they always want to have the exact same colour and exact same pattern as their sisters have (this happens when we do crafts as well) Today I didn’t let the girls see each others nails until they were all completed and each had picked different patterns and colours. I had a realization that they all wanted to be the same because in their mind “same= equal”, “equal=same”. They always want the same amount of attention and praise, and if one receives an extra praise for her beautiful nails then they see that girl as somehow more important or better. AHA! So much of the fighting, arguing and frustration they have with their sisters makes sense now. That being said, I feel like it will be hard to break this habit, but I hope to stress to them that different doesn’t stand for better… or worse for that matter.

Now here’s the analogy, the comparison, the similarity. The triplets are really just a miniature version of our current world. People believe and most likely have always believed and may possibly continue to believe that difference creates inequality. That to have equality you must have sameness, that we Must all believe the same thing, perceive the same, see the same to be equal.

I would like to dispute this!

I believe the core quality of equality is acceptance. If there must be any sameness, let it be that we all treat everything in is world as if  all on the same level. Every single thing on this planet deserves respect and love from the smallest grain of sand to the last star in the Sky. It may seem like such a large, exaggerated, unimaginable expectation but that is how open my mind is.
Equality = acceptance of difference + love x compassion. Such a simple equation.

I want to leave you with this unwisdom challenge of the day, of the month, of your life.

Take a moment, now or later, tomorrow or ten years from now. Just take a moment and let go of every assumption you have about the world. i mean absolutely everything you ASSUME you know. You may be surprised to find that you know nothing at all. Freeing isn’t it?

Peace and love and equality
Lindsay

Violence and Guns and Humanities Problems, Oh My!

Posted: January 21, 2013 in philosophy, writing
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Disclaimer:

I want to clarify that in this blog entry when I refer to “us/we” I’m referring to the global population. This article is not meant to pinpoint any specific country, culture or region. 

There has been much talk lately about gun violence not just in North America but globally. You have some countries claiming their laws inhibit such violence, while others seemingly encourage it. I believe neither of these statements are true, lets face it, guns are like drugs. No matter what laws are put in place, if people want it that bad they will find away to get it.

During these recent discussions there has also been talk about violence displayed in video games, in television and movies, suggesting that maybe this display of aggression is somehow encouraging people to use violence. I’m going to be perfectly honest with you, THAT IS A LOAD OF CRAP!!! The violence in these forms of entertainment come from the violence we display in our everyday lives not the other way around. People aren’t violent because of video games, people are violent because the human species has been violent for most of its existence. How many times in history class did you study a war or a conflict that somehow ended in a form of resolution or desecration of the people causing the so called “problems”? The answer is often. When we teach our children about human growth we are at the same time teaching them that to get ahead, to succeed you must either surrender to the force or crush the force. Humans have been using violence as a means of fixing problems forever and continue to do it daily.

Our own personal actions are what contributes to the ever growing aggression we see in the world. When someone or some group decides to shoot up a school, bomb a town or stab a person the media decides to plaster their faces across all platforms, continuously talking about the person/people in turn making these horrible people famous for the horrendous crimes they’ve committed. Then we discuss PUBLICLY what to do with this person or people, we must hunt them down, do what they did to us, basically stating that revenge is the only option.

Answer me this, are we not always taught two wrongs don’t make a right? Do we not teach our children not to hit back if they are hit? How do we expect people to believe these things if our actions do not show the very concept of what we are teaching? It seems that we are always looking for someone else to blame. Heaven forbid we actually accept responsibility for our actions and attempt to change. No, that would be too much work, its easier to hate than it is to love. To love, you must set aside all differences, all angst and understand that I am a part of you and you are apart of me. When you do something horrible in a sense every human on the planet has done that same horrible thing and vice versa when you do something kind.

Humans are very contradicting and confusing creatures. If I’m being honest (which I always am) I don’t think we will ever be able to stop the violence we see today. In fact, I see it getting much worse before it gets better. Globally we are facing many problems, scarce resources, poverty, pollution, and overpopulation. These things will most likely cause more violence and hatred among us.

So do me a favour today and spread a little more love than you did yesterday. Remember that YOU are part of the problem but YOU can also be a part of the solution.

Peace and Love

Lindsay

Cycle, New Years and Thanks

Posted: January 8, 2013 in Gray Hayles, philosophy, thought, writing
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I just want to start by saying thank you to all the people still visiting my blog. I know I haven’t been posting much lately :/ my bad. That being said I’m glad to see such a positive response to my dramatic readings I feel like I’m being lame by calling them dramatic readings since I am in no way an artist capable of doing dramatic readings. I am so thankful for the support and truly appreciate all the feedback.

Moving on.  New Years, I hope yours was a happy one! I don’t really do resolutions but my plan for this year is to write more and more and more. I don’t enjoy putting finish lines on things but I would really like to complete a full draft of Gray Hayles by the end of the year. So hopefully you will all reap the benefits of that, or maybe the consequences, we’ll have to wait and see how it turns out!

Onto the cycle, I was just thinking about a loss I experienced near the end of last year, there was a moment that I think, forever changed me. I sat in a room with a family member who was near to passing while cradling an infant in my arms. It may not sound so striking, but being there and experiencing the loss of one human being as another human beings life journey just began was the strangest thing in the world. Not only was it confusing but I developed a strong feeling of ambivalence. I was so greatly sad and yet immensely happy at the same time, I was losing someone and gaining someone all at once. It really put into perspective the phrase “circle of life” you can say it all you want but you really have no idea what it means or how it will affect you.

Around and around we go.

Oh and here’s another dramatic reading.

Cycle.

(Re-reading this post I think I should have called it Thanks, New Years and Cycle)

Peace and Love and Dramatic Readings ;p

Lindsay

A Non-Political Rambling Blog Entry About Politics, Carbon Tax and Overconsumption

Posted: November 26, 2012 in open, philosophy, think about it, writing
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Disclaimer: I am not a political person nor do I claim to know much about politics. 

 

Recently I’ve been besieged by a radio ad, it seems every time I get in my car and turn on the radio, I hear this ad. It’s a political ad stating that if “so and so” gets elected as the new leader of the NDP (new democratic party) he will impose a carbon tax on almost all goods and services, in turn, making everything you buy go up in price. The ad also states that if this new tax was instated gas would go up a WHOPPING ten cents a litre. The ad is basically encouraging people not to vote for this “so and so” person in fear of this tax being created. (as you can see this entry is not about who is running for the NDP or who is running against the NDP)

 

I have a serious problem with this ad, I feel like it is mocking me, as if I don’t know that a carbon tax will make prices go up. Isn’t that the point of the tax? To make goods and services go up in price in hopes to curb our consumption, helping us use less, consume less and lower each persons individual carbon footprint ( or maybe I have the wrong definition of carbon tax). For instance, if this tax was created and gas went up ten cents and tax on my car went up as well maybe I would consider buying a new electric car avoiding both the carbon tax and the gas price increase. Or maybe I would stop buying bottled drinks, or buy more fresh products instead ones wrap in layers of plastic and cardboard that were no doubt produced in a huge factory that creates mass amounts of pollution.

 

I think this tax is logical and rational, people don’t seem understand how much useless production and consumption goes on in the world. Maybe having a tax that directly responds to these excesses would help people see that we really don’t NEED to use and produce as much as we do. What we NEED is clean air, clean water, and clean food. Realistically, everything else is a want and just because you want something doesn’t mean you need it. It seems today that people have lost sight of this, suddenly our wants have become our needs and our needs have become something we waste and destroy with our wants. We destroy our clean air, our clean water, our clean food but polluting all three with the materials and by products of our wants and then we create more products to help re-purify these needs in turn creating more waste and pollution. It really is a vicious cycle when you take the time to think about it.

 

That being said I am guilty of all of these things, I drive a gasoline powered car, I take long showers, I buy what I don’t need, I give into my wants daily. I think the difference between me and others maybe that I understand this is not a healthy way to live. I do try to do my part and make up for my discrepancies, but I know I need to do more. What’s upsetting to me is to hear this ad on the radio and know this person/group/political party is trying to encourage people not to think about our overconsumption, to try to make it seem like this “so and so” person is creating this tax simply to make things more expensive for us all.

 

In closing this rambling blog entry I want to state that I do not claim to have the answers to our over consumption problem, in fact, I don’t have answers for anything, I simply ask questions and hope it sparks questioning in others and in their questioning maybe they can find the answers.

 

Peace and Love and Carbon

Lindsay

(I realize now this blog really had nothing to do with politics, but I like the title so I’m keeping it!)

If you enjoyed this entry I strongly suggest you read or watch Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax and the 2011 documentary Surviving Progress

Peace, War, Love, Hate

Posted: November 22, 2012 in inspiration, Love, philosophy, poetry, thought, writing
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Peace has never come from War

Love has never come from Hate

Hate has led to War

War has led to Hate

Love will lead us to Peace

Peace will end in Love

The Polar Bear and Me

Posted: August 22, 2012 in philosophy, poetry, thought, writing
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I had a dream two nights ago about floating on and iceberg with a polar bear. It was very “Life of Pi” and in my dream I wrote this poem. It’s very random and I don’t even know if it really makes sense but I haven’t posted in awhile (sry about that :/) so I thought I would share it with you, here goes:

Floating on an iceberg
The polar bear and me
Both of us left pondering
What it is to be

Every inch the ice smaller
The polar bear and me
Making the decision
On when it’s best to flee

Gazing into the water
The polar bear and me
Only he can swim
In the black as night sea

Sinking ever so slowly
The polar bear and me
Soon it will be the end
Then I will be free

Floating on an iceberg
The polar bear and me
Both of us left wondering
How this came to be

Is it Conceited to Quote Myself?

Posted: August 1, 2012 in philosophy, quote, Quotes, writing
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“I’m not a perfect square, I’m more of an obtuse triangle .”

–

“Flattery will get you nowhere, honesty, however will get you everywhere.”

–

“Open this box and outside you will see, Peace, Love, Bliss, outside it is free.”

I Have the Best Flowers…A Blog in Honour of Friends

Posted: July 15, 2012 in inspiration, Love, philosophy, writing
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I like to think of myself as a good friend. I am fiercely loyal and extremely protective of the ones closest to me. Friends (for me) are just as important as family, in fact they are my family. However, I am not the person who has millions of friends, I am a firm believer that it is not the amount of friends you have but the quality of friends you have. I haven’t always felt this way though. There was a time when I was younger (much younger) when I was “friends” with many people and not people that seemed to be overly caring towards me. This all changed when my best friend at the time told me she could no longer be friends with me if I was going to hang out with people that treated me poorly. This changed my whole perspective, she was right, what was the point in being around ten people who made me feel inferior when I could spend time with one person who I could really be myself with and not feel like I had to live up to any expectations. I will forever be grateful to her for opening my eyes to this concept. I am glad to say she is still one of me best friends to this day and even though we don’t see each other as often as I would like, when we do get together its just like it was when we were twelve. This for me, is the true test of friendship, when you can go months without seeing each other but when you do get together its like you have seen each other everyday.

I am lucky to have to two other girls in my life who I gladly bestow the Best friend title on, my sister being one of them. I know some people say your family can’t be your friends but I don’t believe this. The definition of friend for me is someone who is honest with you, trustworthy and supportive of you and always has your best interest at heart, and my sister fits all of this criteria. I have to admit we haven’t always been close considering the five year age difference (I was the annoyingly mean little sister) but as I’ve grown up I have matured and I look up to her in so many ways. She can tell it to me straight and doesn’t hold back when I’m being difficult (one of the few people who can do this). Recently she gave birth to twins and I was worried about her changing and being different now that she has two people to worry and think about all the time. The truth is she has changed she went from being a normal person to being a super hero. That’s right people I’m friends (and related to) with  a super hero. I am so lucky to have her in my life! Love ya!

Last and certainly not least is my Bestie! I met her many years ago (our moms worked together) but we didn’t become friends until we moved in together when we were taking our first year of University. She is probably the most important person I have met since I moved out and became a grown up :). It’s a great thing when you can have someone with you when your transitioning from adolescence to adulthood especially when they are going through the same transition. We have spent so many nights and days talking about anything and everything. She is another one of those people who can call me out when I’m acting a fool (and she does lol). She is honest and trustworthy and loyal and strong, all the things a friend should be. I haven’t had many hard times but when I have she has always been there, supporting me through. We finish each others sentences, we can communicate just by a look and can laugh at each other (and do all the time!). I feel so blessed to have a friend like her especially when I know of many people who have no one they can talk to and be open with. I wish that everyone could have a friend like her, but I’m not willing to share lol 😉

If you are reading this blog entry because you have friends or because you don’t just know that you need to have people around you that care about you as much as you care about them. Don’t ever feel like you have to change who you are or what you think to keep or gain friends. Those people are not friends, true friends don’t care about that kind of stuff they care about you 🙂 In the words of Kelly Clarkson “I’ve picked all my weeds but kept the flowers”  and I have the best flowers!

On a side note I apologize for the lack of blogs :/ I’ve really been slagging on my writing but I’m back in action now and will make up for it in the coming days 🙂

Peace and Love and Flowers

Lindsay

I Don’t Know Where This Came From but I Like it!

Posted: July 9, 2012 in inspiration, philosophy, thought, writing
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I Don’t Know Where This Came From but I Like it!.

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