Posts Tagged ‘free’

It’s Pride, my city, surrounding area and places across the world are flying the flag with what else Pride! This brings me to the topic of my entry today, Homosexuality(or as I like to call it sexuality!). I was born in the 20th century and maybe was I exposed to more open ideas than some born in other decades or other parts of the world, but I have always been unaffected by same-sex love. It has always been a part of my life and never bothered me. What does bother me is how much other people seem to be bothered by it.

My first memory of homosexuality is from the sitcom Ellen. I think I was about 7 when she came out on her show. For some reason I distinctly remember Ellen leaning over the microphone in an airport and saying “I’m Gay!” After that the show got cancelled and I remember my mom being disappointed because she loved the show and she didn’t seem to mind that Ellen was gay. I’m not even sure I knew what that really meant back then. When I was about 9 my parents sat my sister and I down and told us my Uncle had come out as gay I think my response to this news was something like “Okay, can I go back to playing now?” I knew at this time that being gay meant dating someone of the same sex, I don’t know how I knew this. I don’t remember my parents telling me what it meant to be homosexual, I wasn’t very sheltered as a child so I’m guessing I saw or heard about it from television. Having a family member who was gay didn’t really change anything for me personally. At some point I met a boyfriend of my Uncles and all I can remember thinking is they hug like my parents hug, they hold hands like my parents hold hands, they kiss like my parents kiss. In their entirety they loved like my parents loved, and I was content with that. My family seemed to continue on just like it had before, nothing changed. I don’t know if being exposed to the lifestyle as a child aided in my acceptance or it’s just who I am. I don’t care who you love as long as you treat them right. This seems logical to me. You dating a man or a woman has no affect on me personally so why would I care?

I know people who say “I accept homosexual people I just don’t want to see it,” What does that mean? You accept them but you don’t want to see them be affectionate? That is not acceptance. Some people say,  “I just wish they wouldn’t rub their sexuality in my face,” again to this I say what? Don’t heterosexual people flaunt their heterosexuality all the time, walking in public holding hands, kissing, touching? Heterosexual people don’t have to sit their family and friends down and say, “I have something to tell you, I’m straight!” So why should homosexuals. Why does homosexuality have to be something that has to be announced like it is automatic that you are supposed to be born straight and if you’re not you either have to hide or tell the whole world?

I don’t understand people who say that you choose to be gay. You choose to be gay as much as you choose to be straight, or as mush as you choose your hair, eye or skin color. My common argument to this topic is “Why would you choose to be ridiculed, taunted and bullied?” I also don’t get people who say there is no such thing as bisexuality, you must either like boys or girls, it’s impossible to like both. No one has the right to decide how you feel about any specific person except you.

Sexuality is on a spectrum, and any person can fall anywhere on that spectrum. People are so concerned about life being black and white, no grey, no in between. Here’s a fact people IT’S ALL IN BETWEEN. The truth is there is there no black and white, there is no right and wrong, there is no gay and straight, there just is.

In the end you are who you are and you love who you love and I’m okay with that. I wish more people would be okay with it too.

Some think I am weird

afraid to come to near

but I am not to be feared

 

He thinks I am a disease

expecting me to please

this is what he sees

 

She thinks I am poser

burning me with her smolder

wanting only for me to hold her

 

You think I am an inspiration

playing with your imagination

all of Me is a collaboration

 

They think I am insane

pushing to me to detain

but my spirit will not be slain

 

I think we can be free

if only we choose to see

each person selflessly

wordsofhonestunwisdom

I have read a few articles within the past year stating that Legalizing Gay Marriage would be America’s downfall and that accepting the gay rights movement could corrupt the world’s youth. Strewing morals of who people are supposed to love. This astonishes me!

Let me ask you this, was the Women’s Rights movement a downfall for humanity? Was the African-American Civil Rights movement a downfall to society? Of course not, these were not hindrances to the world these improved it. How can acceptance and recognition and equality hurt humanity?

What hurts us as a Global population are things like bombing/killing/blowing up other people and countries thinking that this is the only way to get a point across; Or letting whole countries and continents starve as others exceedingly prosper; Genocide, Xenophobia, Judgement, Stereotypes, Greed, Power. These are the things that cause hate, suffering and despair in the world.

I find…

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Sometimes when we are struggling and suffering in our lives we tend to become angry at the situation we are in. Often times asking The Universe “Why me? Can it get any worse? How did this happen?” As I have gotten older (even though I still consider myself a kid, even though I’m not) I have realized that becoming angry at any situation does not make it better. Being grateful however, can make your mood about the situation change. Next time you are facing adversity stop and take a moment to be grateful for all the things you do have and the things that bring you joy and happiness. I know it can be extremely hard to follow this advice and I too am one who can be known to fight gratefulness. Sometimes when your down you don’t want to focus on the good because everything around you appears bad. So next time you’re having a difficult time in life, struggling or just being unhappy think about these few words below. Think about all that you do have and not what you are losing or fighting. Just being grateful for breathing can have a powerful affect on your psyche.

“Change your Attitude to Gratitude.” (These words just popped into my head this morning, I love it when that happens!)

I was suggested this video by a fellow blogger who thought I might be intrigued by it. He was right! I am not a business person but what this guy is talking about makes sense. The only way to be successful and inspiring is to know WHY you do something. Not the end result of WHAT you want to accomplish. It is a tad long and may seem boring to some but the last 4 minutes of the video is worth everything. After all “Martin Luther King wrote the I have a Dream Speech not the I have a Plan speech.” The Golden Circle is something we all should look into applying in our lives. Hope you take some time to watch! 🙂

http://www.ted.com/talks/simon_sinek_how_great_leaders_inspire_action.html

http://liberatedself.wordpress.com/

This story has been haunting me, these characters are so real, honest and true to me. I cried when I wrote this part. I realized these people are so much a part of me and this is a story I need to tell and it is a story that will be told, my mind will accept nothing less. Here is another blurb from Gray Hayles: (I apologize for not including names but I would like to keep some things a secret so when I finish the story all of it isn’t known)

As we walked underneath the canopy of stars, I wrapped my arm around her waist. Holding her hand was not enough anymore, I had to have her closer, nearer, soaking in all the warmth of her love she so freely radiated. She was like my own personal sunshine, penetrating me with constant rays of love, compassion and kindness. I felt her slide her hand up my neck, she pulled me in close locking her chocolate gaze on mine. She gently pressed her velvet lips against mine, my hands began to tingle and my knees went weak. I squeezed her waist tighter, desperately trying to keep myself from falling into her body. Just then she pulled away and looked me deep in the eye. She drew in a deep breath, smiled that glorious smile and said, “Thank God I met you, ” she uttered the words with such conviction.

Suddenly I felt a sharp pain at the base of my skull, as I fell to the ground I heard her scream. Momentarily blinded I began to panic, my ears went silent and I was transported to a dark, warm place where I had an overt sense of happiness. I began to question am I dead? In an instant I was thrust back to reality. My eyes jolted open and my chest convulsed as I gulped air into my deprived lungs.

As things slowly came into focus I saw her face, she smiled, but as things became clearer I was struck. There was no words to describe the horror I felt in that moment. Her face was swollen and badly bruise, she had a large lump above her left cheek which was pressed awkwardly against the road. Her leather jacket was gone and her dress was torn exposing her skin which was now painted a beautiful shade of red. I examined her body for other afflictions but everything seemed intact. There was an unusual amount of blood pooling around her  head, it began to leak into the cracks in the pavement, every second rushing closer to me. She kept her brown marble eyes on me, her breathing became slower, her smile never left. I noticed my own river of blood escaping my body, creating its own streams, snaking through the road eventually merging into an ocean of blood dividing us. It was warm, like a liquid blanket protecting me from the brisk midnight air.

I tried to speak but nothing would come out, I tried to move but it was as if my muscles had left my body. My bones felt like metal rods grinding my flesh into the cement. My right arm was stretched out in front of me, I wished I could reach further and touch her face. She began to flinch and cough, then a small stream of blood fell from her mouth. Still looking at me she began to drag her arm from the side of her body. It seemed to take hours for her to reach my fingers, but she did. There we lay, our arms drowning in a cocktail of our blood. She began to cough more, choking on the flow pouring from her mouth.

I began to accept that this was it, this was how we would die. I was trying to make peace out of this knowing. I tried to be thankful for being able to share our last moments together, but I was resentful. I felt her squeeze what little of my hand she had grasped. Staring at her, I focussed all my energy on squeezing back. I must have succeeded because I saw her beautiful face display a broader smile. Within seconds of what I now know was our last embrace, she took her last breath and her lips released the crescent she had so stubbornly held. Her eyes never closed and her spirit did not abandon the earth, instead she hovered above my body raining down a gentle calm. My stare was locked on her once glistening eyes as rivers flowed from mine.

At first I began to ask for her back, begging the universe, promising my life, if only she would come back to her body, back to me. When my attempts failed I then began to ask to be taken with her, but my prayers were not answered. Instead I laid there labouring to breathe, my head throbbing in pain, my love laying there lifeless parallel to my body. I felt like I had been there for days but as I looked up I realized the canopy of stars still lit the night sky.

I started a Words of Unwisdom YouTube channel where I will be posting inspirational videos and a few creations of my own. If you have any videos you would like to share with me please do. Also I’m hoping to do a Video blog once a month on a range of topics (depending on my schedule). Right now all I have posted is a simple video of my poem There Once was a Girl who Lived in a Box, but I plan to get more content up in the next few weeks. Check it out if your interested and share it if your inspired to do so!

Dear uWise One, You are anything but unwise. I love what you have to say about yourself and what you write. I take it you’re from Canada? Would like to know more about what has most influenced you as a person, poet and philosophical searcher. I wish there were more unWise ones in the world. It humbles me and gives me hope for the future.
– Gordon Stewart –

 First of all thank you for your questions and kind words. I assure you they humble me. 🙂

At first I was skeptical of answering this question because I really have no education in the area of philosophy or writing. All I know is that I was always an inquisitive child, curious for answers asking endless bounds of questions. My parents were very helpful in this development they always encouraged me to ask questions and listen and talk about anything and everything. I also had a passion for writing poetry and prose as a child. I remember being encouraged by my grade 2 teacher to never stop writing and I have listened to her. When I look back at my writings from childhood I see the wonder and curiosity I had that started from very young age and seemingly sprouted out of no where. My only explanation for it is that I must have been born with it. Even so I have never considered myself a writer or a poet or even an artist. (however with all this blog love I might started considering it)

That being said my real philosophical journey began after I dropped out of university. Once I left I began to read endless amounts of books about everything. I was so angry at being forced to read books during my 14 years in the education system. I always hated reading in school and being expected to have certain opinions or understand the book in a certain way. So I rebelled by reading as many books as I wanted on every topic that interested me (oh what a rebel, ha!). The more I read, the more I wrote, and the more I wrote the more I read. It was a continuous circle of thoughts, ideas and questions. Then one day in 2010 I went to Chapters Bookstore to pick up some books on the 2012 End of The World Prophecies as I had become weirdly curious with this concept. I pulled a book from a shelf and another book tipped over, my eyes were drawn to the tilted book and I was immediately intrigued by the title, it read The Book of Not Knowing By Peter Ralston. I picked it up and put it on the pile of others I had collected. When I got home I and in the following weeks I read through the 2012 books and was almost convinced that the world could realistically end in two years (ah how naive). A few days later I began The Book of Not Knowing and my mind was immediately expanded.

I have to admit with minimal education the book was difficult for me to read/understand but the book reassured me that what I was reading now, would make more sense later if only I would keep reading. So I did as it asked. Everyday I read more, I did the exercises it asked me to do. Some were writing exercises others were focussed solely on your thoughts and awareness. Every time I would read the book I could almost feel my mind being opened. The weird thing was that book was not providing me with any answers in fact it started making me question things that I thought I had the answers for.    Eventually I came to the near end of the book in which it asks you to re-read from the beginning because this was the point of no return. I was shocked. It had taken me months to get through the bulk of the book and now I was expected to re-read it before I finished it?! Needless to say I was irritated so I simply closed the book and pledged to myself that I would re-read it eventually but not anytime soon.

Well, it has been two years since I put the book down I have yet to re-read and finish it but yet I am still feeling the effects of what I read everyday. When I stopped reading the book was when my real, honest and true philosophical journey began. In the simplest sense The Book of Not Knowing made me question everything I thought I knew and contemplate anything that could ever be or not be. It recharged my love for curiosity, philosophy, ontology and life in general. I still plan on finishing it one day but not until I feel I’m losing sight on the things I have learned…or better yet unlearned.

Check it out:

http://www.amazon.com/Book-Not-Knowing-Exploring-Consciousness/dp/1556438575

http://www.gordoncstewart.com

Des..ire

Posted: February 8, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

“My only desire is not to desire.” L.D

Lie

Lie always

Lie never

Lie then, lie now

Lie for you

Lie for me

Breathe

Breathe in

Breathe out

Breathe deep, breathe slow

Breathe while sleeping

Breathe while awake

Cry

Cry more

Cry less

Cry morning, cry night

Cry when happy

Cry when sad

Think 

Think hard

Think soft

Think less, think more

Think in madness

Think in peace

See

See everything

See nothing

See loss, see bliss

See the light

See the darkness

Live

Live once

Live always

Live caged, live boundless

Live with love

Live with freedom